


homecoming (but not yet)

by fallingwish



Category: One Piece
Genre: Canon Compliant, Gen, Post-Marineford, koala is there too and a few characters get mentioned but its mostly sabo, shoutout to the koala&sabo tag and the sabo&luffy tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:09:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27416293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingwish/pseuds/fallingwish
Summary: After Sabo is awake, after he's calmed down and had a few days to settle back into his own skin, to wrestle withthe Sabo of the Revolutionary Army who leads fearlesslyandthe Sabo from Goa Kingdom who hates himself and ran away but still couldn't escapeand maybe find some sort of peace when guilt and grief still churns in his stomach — after all that, he picks up his Chief of Staff duties again and walks early into a meeting with one of their scout teams.or, Sabo regains his memories, is weighed down by guilt and grief, and...does not go find his brother.Not yet.
Comments: 15
Kudos: 33





	homecoming (but not yet)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [grainjew](https://archiveofourown.org/users/grainjew/gifts).



> dedicated to zeph grainjew mostly bc they write so many things i get inspired to write things also  
> also shoutout to the its pirates server for being a creative force of inspiration

After Sabo is awake, after he's calmed down and had a few days to settle back into his own skin, to wrestle with _the Sabo of the Revolutionary Army who leads fearlessly_ and _the Sabo from Goa Kingdom who hates himself and ran away but still couldn't escape_ and maybe find some sort of peace when guilt and grief still churns in his stomach — after all that, he picks up his Chief of Staff duties again and walks early into a meeting with one of their scout teams. The room is empty save for his partner, who sits primly at a seat near the head of the table, a stack of paperwork in front of her. His grip tightens over the brim of his hat, a smile ghosting his features, as he takes a step into the room.

Koala glances up, tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, and, without preamble, asks if he wants a few days off to 'say any hello's'.

Sabo stops short in the doorway, staring at her. She stares back, dark eyes unwavering. Turning slightly to face him, she leans her elbow against the table and rests her chin in her palm. Her other hand goes into her lap, pen spinning between fingers in a motion Sabo recognizes as a nervous habit.

The room is quiet.

His instinct is to wave it off, to sigh loudly in her direction, to snort, _I already said I wasn't leaving, didn't I?_ , but…

She’s not asking about leaving forever. They’d covered that already, when he had woken up covered in sweat to find her and Hack glued to his bedside, her cheerful demeanor replaced with wide eyes full of tears. Koala had blubbered about him leaving the movement, and he’d quickly assured her that he wasn’t. But…

Well, she understands, about family you don't care to see anymore — 

( Somewhere out on the Grand Line, tucked away in a small village on Foolshout Island, is a woman who no longer holds the right to call herself a mother. Somewhere out in the East Blue, nestled into the safety of Goa Kingdom's noble district, is a man who has one son vying for the hand of the princess, instead of two. )

— and she also understands, about family you've found and never want to let go. 

( Somewhere out in the Grand Line, traveling the seas, sailing the waves on the decks of the Snapper Head, are the remains of Koala’s favorite saviors. Somewhere out in the East Blue, in a run-down shack on the top of Mt. Corvo, a curly-haired bandit has gone from having three sons, to two, to maybe none. )

( Somewhere out in the world, a boy from Dawn Island has suddenly become all alone. )

The guilt that eats away at Sabo's heart yearns feverishly to find that boy, wants nothing more than to head for the small boats they keep docked for solo missions, to track down where he is, to hold him close, to apologize for leaving and ask for forgiveness. It wants to cry and scream and mourn the loss of their mutual brother, to find solace with each other, to assure him of the fact that he is not _alone_. Loneliness, he remembers, is what Luffy had feared the most — why else had he chased after Ace for so long?

Now Ace is gone, and Luffy has lost two brothers, and Sabo can’t help but remember the Luffy that was always following after them through the forests of Mt. Corvo, always reaching for their backs. If only Sabo could find him, could hold him in his arms, could assure himself that Luffy is _alive_ — but none of their sources have any clue what has happened to “Straw Hat” Monkey D. Luffy: the Heart Pirates' Polar Tang had disappeared beneath the waves, vanishing into murky depths where lava and ice and light could not reach them, and the Warlord "Pirate Empress" Boa Hancock had taken a Marine ship and gone after the submarine, with no report of success or failure.

It's a bitter feeling, to want to hug someone you can't reach. He wonders if this is what Luffy and Ace had felt, when he had "died" all those years ago, and the guilt sinks into his stomach.

It's not that he can't do anything about it. He could keep his ears pinned to the ground, could spend weeks upon weeks combing through their network of information, could hope to find even a morsel of an idea where to start looking. He could go back to Dawn Island and sit in a treehouse and relish in the memories of when the Sabo of Goa Kingdom had been _happy_.

But Sabo can't run off for that long. Sabo, the child from Goa Kingdom, has grown up. Sabo, the Chief of Staff of the Revolutionary Army, has responsibilities, has people under his command, has a dream of seeing seas freed from the tyranny of the current establishment.

 _This place is just like a birdcage,_ a younger version of him had lamented, small fingers putting shaking letters onto parchment. The memories are fresh in his mind, seared into his consciousness by their sudden return. _What is freedom? Where can I find it?_

The Sabo of Goa Kingdom had believed, foolishly, that freedom could be found anywhere outside of Goa Kingdom — that freedom could be tasted in the salt of the ocean spray, could be seen in the lush foliage of faraway kingdoms, could be heard in the songs of dock workers and tavern crawlers. He had dreamed of documenting his travels, of being a pirate and sailing the world, of writing a book to share with others the joys of the world. What a legacy that would have been, to pen stories of free soil and open skies to others who needed a taste of freedom?

The Sabo of the Revolutionary Army knows now that there is more than one Goa Kingdom out in the seas, knows that the Goa Kingdoms of the world have dug their claws into as many islands as there are stars in the night sky.

_Ace! Luffy! Let's go out to sea someday! Let's get out of this country! So we can be free!_

Can they truly be free, with the world in the state it's in?

He blinks, and wonders how long he's been staring blankly at Koala. "No, it's fine," he answers, finally, continuing to his seat. He pulls his hat off of his head and plops it onto the large table, nodding towards the empty seats. "There's still work to be done. A kingdom's waiting for us to save it." Koala watches him for a second, two seconds, five, those dark eyes unblinking, before she nods and returns her pen to paper, signing off on another report. The scout team enters the room not a moment later, and they start the debriefing.

A few days later, he sees Luffy in the latest issue of the World Economy. His brother stands, crowned by a halo of dust and storm, a wall of Marines rising behind him. Weapons are raised in the air, arms outstretched in attempts to get to him first, but the look on his younger brother's face is somber, unminding of the danger behind him. Fresh bandages wrap around his left arm, and dark letters glisten on his right — _that's new_ , Sabo notes, _He didn't have that as a kid_ — and Luffy clutches a familiar straw hat to his chest as he stands in remembrance.

 _Accompanied by Warlord “Knight of the Sea” Jinbei and “Dark King” Silvers Rayleigh_ , the article whispers. _Monkey D. Luffy rang the ox bell sixteen times and then stood before the chasm in silence — a moment of silence, or a declaration of war?_

Sabo looks at the photo, drinks in the pictaured frame of his remaining brother, etches his very-much-alive figure into his mind.

His little brother is fine, for the moment. Luffy isn’t the same little kid his memories remember him as, that snot-nosed little brat who could never win a fight against him or Ace. He’s not alone anymore.

The guilt eating at his heart and pooling in his stomach shifts, solidifies into conviction.

Sabo does not go back to Dawn Island.

He hopes Dadan will forgive him, this once, for not making it home.

( Two years later, Sabo of the Revolutionary Army buys three sake cups, the surfaces smooth and unblemished, and a bottle of Dadan's favorite sake, and visits the boy from Dawn Island. )

( Together, they set free a country trapped within a birdcage of its own, and he sees for himself his brother’s bonds. )

( It sets his heart at ease. )

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this entire thing in a haze at varying 3ams haha  
> thank you for reading!


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